Breaking the Silence: Understanding and Overcoming Child and Adolescent Social Anxiety
Social anxiety can be an excruciatingly painful journey for children, especially for those whose social anxiety keeps them from doing the things they want to do.
Children with social anxiety may feel nervous or self-conscious in social situations, which can make it hard for them to make friends, participate in class, or even attend school. As a parent, it can be hard to know how to support your child through these challenges. It can be particularly challenging to figure out when and how insistently to encourage children to tackle the things that are making them anxious. Here are a few things to keep in mind:
Recognize the signs: Social anxiety can look different for everyone, but some common signs include shyness, avoidance of social situations, and difficulty making eye contact. If you notice your child is experiencing these symptoms consistently, it may be worth talking to a professional about social anxiety.
Be a supportive presence: Children with social anxiety need to know that their feelings are heard and that they are not alone. Let your child know that you know they are going through a difficult time and that you are there to support them.
Seek professional help: A professional can provide your child with the tools they need to manage their social anxiety. This may include therapy, medication, or a combination of both. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) and Sensitive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions (SPACE) are all highly effective, evidence-based treatments for social anxiety in children and teens.
Help them build social skills: Children with social anxiety often avoid social interaction. This means fewer opportunities to interact with others and develop age-appropriate social skills. As a result, children with social anxiety may also struggle with fundamental social skills in addition to things like making friends and initiating conversations. Encourage your child to practice social skills in a safe and supportive environment, such as a playdate with a trusted friend.
Model healthy coping mechanisms: Children learn by example. If you handle your own anxiety in healthy ways, your child will be more likely to do the same.
Help them challenge negative thoughts: Children with social anxiety may have negative thoughts about themselves and their abilities. They often overestimate the likelihood of something going wrong, and tend to ascribe a higher intensity to "how bad it will be." To complicate matters, they commonly underestimate their capacity to cope. Encourage your child to challenge these thoughts and to focus on the positive aspects of social situations.
Be consistent: Children with social anxiety may need extra support and encouragement to participate in social activities and face their fears. Be consistent in your encouragement and support, and remind your child that they can do it.
It's essential to remember that social anxiety is treatable and that with the right help, your child can learn to manage their symptoms and enjoy social situations. As a parent, you play a critical role in helping your child navigate social anxiety and building the skills they need for success in the long run. You are not alone in this journey and your child's feelings and struggles are real. Let them know you are there for them and that they can overcome this!
